It’s starting to get real y’all. We only have one backsplash left to paint before things get serious. If you’ve been following along on our journey for a little while, you know that our twins were a result of IVF. You also know that we have been saving for ‘round 2’ which will be a frozen embryo transfer. We’re getting so close to our financial goal, and my anxiety level is through the roof. We know how lucky we were with that first round, and absolutely don’t take it for granted. Knowing that we have two more frozen embryos, it’s easy to hope for a similar outcome… but statistically, we need to prepare our hearts for the worst.
Ironically, this week is Infertility Awareness week. Because of the shame that often accompanies infertility, it’s something that often goes unsaid. So many women (and men) are living in such pain and despair without anyone to talk to. Let’s make it common knowledge. Let’s not be ashamed. Let’s discuss our feelings and reach out to others experiencing something similar. Let’s be brave women.
Dear Embryos,
I’ve been missing you. I’m so excited at the thought of being able to meet you and hold you in my arms one day… yet also terrified that something might go horribly wrong. The scariest thing for me is knowing that you might not even make it through the thawing process. I’m so grateful for these medical advancements, and have to remind myself often that we wouldn’t even have this opportunity 20+ years ago. Your sisters aren’t old enough to understand, and we don’t want them to be disappointed, so we’re leaving them in the dark for now. It’s hard to believe that you have a complete set of DNA… a tiny microscopic person. I love you with a mothers love. Be strong little embryos! It won’t be long now.
~Mommy
14 years ago this June I gave birth to twin boys that are gorgeous young men now. They were the result of frozen IVF. The fresh attempt did not take but round 2 with frozen was the key. (our doctor said he had great results with frozen) Sending good thoughts and prayers to you!
This makes me feel a little bit more at ease about my FET next week. 🙂
Good luck with your FET Kim! It’s so exciting!
I hope it works and that you soon have two more beautiful healthy children!!
I couldn’t help but shed some tears as I read your mommy letter to your sweet babies in-waiting. I too have lived the life of infertility. Invetro was not a familiar word during the 1970’s but my doctor did perform a primitive form of it for me. Unfortunately, it did not work but God had a beautiful plan waiting for me. January 4, 1980, I held my 36 hour old son for the first time in the hospital nursery and August 22, 1983, I held my 35 hour old daughter for the first time in a different hospital nursery. My mother’s heart could not have been in more love as I cuddled the gifts God had planned. My son and wife had five children but lost two (my angel grandbabies) and my daughter and husband have five children. Ask me if I love being a grandmother! : )
My prayers are with you, Nick and the girls as God’s plan for your whole family unfolds. Keep well rested for you have some even busier, fun-filled days, months, and years ahead. Blessings on you all!
Thank you so much for sharing your beautiful story Ruth.
I’ve been following your blog since our fertility issues began, and I also love DIY. 🙂 I’m 37 next month, and we’re on our 3rd IVF after 6 failed IUI’s. It’s been very devistating, draining and time has seemingly stood still through the whole experience. In 2 days I find out if any of our 3 embryos have decided to stick around and become a part of our crazy little family. I’ve had so many emotions, including jealousy and resentment for others who become pregnant easily, and maybe a little for those who’ve had better luck with fertility treatments. But I’ve also felt elation when friends or people like you have had better luck with treatments and haven’t had to go through what we have. It’s been 20 months since we’ve started trying, which has been the entirety of our marriage. Amazingly, as hard as it’s been, we’ve managed to become closer and stronger as a couple. This in turn reminds me that others may not be as fortunate to have such a strong bond with their spouse, and I’m eternally greatful for that. I know we’re both excitedly hoping for the best, but we will get through it if the outcome is otherwise. I’m so happy for you and hopeful that your second cycle is successful as well. Positive baby thoughts coming your way.
Fellow IVFer,
Becca
Wow Becca, thank you for sharing this. I know how blessed we have been that our first IVF attempted was so successful. I hope with my whole heart that this time works for you! Please keep me updated.
Damp eyes over here. I’m channeling all my positive thoughts your way. It’s exciting how close you are to round 2. I’m hoping it’s wildly successful. I always appreciate your bravery and courage on the matter. You’re the voice of millions of struggling women. Lots of love to my favorite SyWassinks
Hey girl be brave its going to be fine and soon you will have two cute babies in your arms..
love from Pakistan <3
Best of luck to you and your beautiful little family! I hope it comforts you to know that God is in charge and has a plan. Sending up prayers for you!
beautiful post. prayers for you guys!
Hey,
I have followed you throughout this journey and I am so thankful that you have been so transparent. It seems like I have become aware of so many women dealing with infertility. Without you sharing your pain, frustration and joys, I don’t think I would be a good friend to them. So. Thank you.
I will continue to pray for you. I’m sure you heard the scream of joy from SW Iowa when you announced the pending arrival of your twinnies….I’m preparing to out do myself. 😉
You are dear to me.
Terri
Best of luck to you! What a sweet little letter. I get tears when I think of them as little people and hoping you get to hold them soon!
Sending blessings and love to you!
Love that necklace. I clicked on the source but couldn’t find it there. Do you have any info on it?
I know I’m not Bethany, but I’ve followed the shop that makes that piece on Etsy for about 4 years. Here’s the link for Etsy: https://www.etsy.com/listing/60766367/eventually-infertility-necklace-adoption?ref=sr_gallery_1&ga_search_query=eventually&ga_order=most_relevant&ga_view_type=gallery&ga_ship_to=US&ga_search_type=handmade#
Or they’ve since changed their name to “Charmed Collections” and also have a new website. http://www.charmedcollections.com/products/eventually-necklace
Hope that helps Lyndsey!
Kara, thanks so much for letting me know that I had the wrong link! I’m going to go update the post now! These ‘Eventually’ necklaces are so sweet, and she deserves a shoutout. 🙂
wow, that is great news Bethany! So very very excited for you all, and will be praying that your babies have a smooth and safe transfer.
Praying for those little guys to be strong and withstand all that is coming their way! Thank you for updating us on your thoughts/concerns about the process. Best of luck to everyone and keep us in the loop 🙂
B- love you. Love your babies. Praying so many prayers for you guys. Keep me SO posted. Praying that the next time we see each other we will be so full of mommy love.
xoxo
Good luck! Your letter to your embroys made me good cry! Will be thinking of you and your family. I’m pregnant now (Kind of a miracle!) so I’m sending my good pregnancy vibes your way! All the best!
Okay, I’m crying. Praying fiercely for you, friend, whatever the outcome He has in mind.
LoveLoveLoveLoveLoveLove.
Dang it, Beth!! You had to get all touchy- feely and super honest – Ah! You made me cry at work again!
I love you and your perfect micro-people. I cannot wait to meet them and kiss their chubby cheeks!
Be strong, Nick and Beth! We’re right here with you!
Tears in my eyes now. Best of luck. Ok more tears now…..
We’re due to start our 1st ivf this month, I know I should be excited but I just feel so down that we have to go through it to start with. I’m hoping some positivity will start to come through once we actually start the process. Fingers crossed for both of us!
Saying prayers for you and Nick. I know you said not to say this but just relax. It is in the hands of your good doctor and God, both experts in their fields! Praying for a great outcome and hoping that you soon feel the symptons of morning sickness!
Teared up. I’m so excited for you all and so nervous as well. I will be thinking of you and really appreciate the candidness of the whole situation. Best of luck.
Saying prayers for you! I hope that everything goes well for your FET!
Oh boy. Brings tears to my eyes. Hoping for an amazing outcome!
Brings tears to myes as well… see I can’t even type through them…lol Sending prayers and good mojo your way…best of luck Beth and Nick…!!!
I have been following your blog for awhile now & am so deeply excited for you. My sister has unexplained fertility, they never got as far as IVF because she couldn’t handle any more treatments emotionally so they went through the adoption process to make their family. They also started an infertility support group in Cedar Falls if anyone is interested!
Hi Jessica! Could you pass me more information on the support group? I live in Waterloo. I didn’t know there was anything in the area. Thank you! Jocelyn.
Hi Jocelyn! The link to their facebook page is https://www.facebook.com/index.php?lh=859e3e07d82b26df9cc26c4b222a98d0&#!/cviplsg It is called the Cedar Valley Infertility Peer-Led Support Group. I was noticing when I was getting the link, that if you do a search for it, the group doesn’t show up, so if you can’t access it – let me know (either on here, or find me on facebook – Jessica Cecak from LeGrand,Iowa) and I’ll get you in contact with my sister.
Hoping for the best <3
xoxo, Cait!
Sending heartfelt thoughts and prayers.
Best best best of luck! I hope those little embryos get to be babies soon! Sending lots of prayers, good vibes, and mojo your way.
Best of luck! Our fresh cycle didn’t work out for us and it was devestating. Our frozen we had two beautiful babies implanted and one took! The FET is way easier physically IMO. Rest up! You’re soon going to have baby growing to do!