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Reality Daydream

The Dream is Free, The Hustle Sold Separately

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I Remember

March 25, 2011 by Bethany Sy

Its weird, because there are times when I allow myself to feel like a regular pregnant lady. Just another woman incubating a little human life. Like being pregnant is a completely natural gift to each woman. But then there are times when my heart aches for those that are still suffering, barren. I feel the two lives growing within me, and think about how unfair it is for me to have two… when others would give up everything for just one. It hurts to remember my friends who are suffering from a lack (or loss) of life. But I choose to remember. It’s a part of me. At the end of the day, I’m still infertile. Endometriosis everywhere. Sometimes I stand in the mirror with tears in my eyes, just looking at my belly. Not sure if it’s real. Sometimes I feel like I’m lying to myself and everyone around me; a fake. Maybe I’ve just been eating too many cupcakes? Could it really be true? Of all the hundreds of negative pregnancy tests I’ve taken, would it really be positive now? Do I deserve this blessing?

About Bethany Sy

Nick and Bethany Sy are the creative free-spirits behind DIY/Lifestyle blog, Reality Daydream. They recently purchased a historic mansion and have been documenting the ups and downs of renovation and making this home their own... all while sharing tips and tutorials along the way! When they found themselves in the trenches of infertility, they started a journey that would prove to be their most important DIY project ever, and have 3 beautiful girls to show for it. <3

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Comments

  1. 18

    remiread says

    November 21, 2011 at 9:54 pm

    Thank you, thank you, thank you for your beautiful blog and the hope it brings me.

    Reply
  2. 19

    Anonymous says

    March 31, 2011 at 12:04 am

    We did our FET last month and just found out it worked a week ago. While we have told only our parents I also feel like it’s a dream I’m bound to wake up from or as though I’m lying to them. Seeing you write that makes me realize that these crazy thoughts are perfectly normal for those of us that went through the trenches. Enjoy this wonderful blessing because you certainly deserve it!!

    Reply
  3. 20

    Anonymous says

    March 31, 2011 at 12:04 am

    We did our FET last month and just found out it worked a week ago. While we have told only our parents I also feel like it’s a dream I’m bound to wake up from or as though I’m lying to them. Seeing you write that makes me realize that these crazy thoughts are perfectly normal for those of us that went through the trenches. Enjoy this wonderful blessing because you certainly deserve it!!

    Reply
  4. 21

    L says

    March 29, 2011 at 1:47 am

    You completely deserve these 2 little blessings!

    Reply
  5. 22

    L says

    March 29, 2011 at 1:47 am

    You completely deserve these 2 little blessings!

    Reply
  6. 23

    Deborah Harmison says

    March 29, 2011 at 1:02 am

    Thank you for writing about your struggles and challenges. I think you should know that when I have talked to you about our fertility issues, you have been encouraging and so informative. I would come to you in a heart beat because I know you would be there for me and be understanding. I wish we lived closer to each other. You are so strong and will be an amazing mom. You deserve to be a mom and those little girls are going to be so lucky to have you as their mother. You are encouraging.

    Reply
  7. 24

    Deborah Harmison says

    March 29, 2011 at 1:02 am

    Thank you for writing about your struggles and challenges. I think you should know that when I have talked to you about our fertility issues, you have been encouraging and so informative. I would come to you in a heart beat because I know you would be there for me and be understanding. I wish we lived closer to each other. You are so strong and will be an amazing mom. You deserve to be a mom and those little girls are going to be so lucky to have you as their mother. You are encouraging.

    Reply
  8. 25

    Anonymous says

    March 27, 2011 at 7:31 am

    I am glad you remember. There are many of us who will never be pregnant. You are one of the few mothers-to-be who understand even a fraction of that pain.

    Reply
  9. 26

    Anonymous says

    March 27, 2011 at 7:31 am

    I am glad you remember. There are many of us who will never be pregnant. You are one of the few mothers-to-be who understand even a fraction of that pain.

    Reply
  10. 27

    MrsTerri says

    March 26, 2011 at 3:18 pm

    I’m glad you’re remembering. I’m glad you will always remember. The sorrow and frustration and pain make your joy now so much more. AND knowing that sorrow and frustration and pain will make it so you are a balm to others.

    I love seeing your growing belly. I still cry when I think of you pregnant. I am overjoyed at being able to witness if even from afar you becoming a mom.

    Bethany, you have always been very special to me, although I doubt you know it. You and your sibs were a special balm to me. You brought laughter and noise in to my very quiet house, and, well…I have always loved the Klinges. 😉

    Reply
  11. 28

    MrsTerri says

    March 26, 2011 at 3:18 pm

    I’m glad you’re remembering. I’m glad you will always remember. The sorrow and frustration and pain make your joy now so much more. AND knowing that sorrow and frustration and pain will make it so you are a balm to others.

    I love seeing your growing belly. I still cry when I think of you pregnant. I am overjoyed at being able to witness if even from afar you becoming a mom.

    Bethany, you have always been very special to me, although I doubt you know it. You and your sibs were a special balm to me. You brought laughter and noise in to my very quiet house, and, well…I have always loved the Klinges. 😉

    Reply
  12. 29

    Anonymous says

    March 25, 2011 at 7:47 pm

    You ARE a normal pregnant woman. The Lord has blessed you and your husband in every way possible it doesn’t matter how you got here. 🙂 The tears you shed are no different than the tears we have all cried standing in the mirror looking at our growing bellies and thinking about what God has given us. Enjoy all that it is for they will be here soon and the than the real “FUN” begins. YOU are worthy of what you have been given! IT IS TRUE!

    Reply
  13. 30

    Anonymous says

    March 25, 2011 at 7:09 pm

    Life is unfair sometime, yet it so precious and special in every way:-)

    Reply
  14. 31

    Candice says

    March 25, 2011 at 5:25 pm

    I feel the same way sometimes! I’m pretty far along yet I’m constantly amazed that something actually worked for once. I wish I could make all my infertile friend magically pregnant also.

    Reply
  15. 32

    Candice says

    March 25, 2011 at 5:25 pm

    I feel the same way sometimes! I’m pretty far along yet I’m constantly amazed that something actually worked for once. I wish I could make all my infertile friend magically pregnant also.

    Reply
  16. 33

    Kelly says

    March 25, 2011 at 4:49 pm

    It’s one of the greatest blessings ever – ranks right up there with finding the love of you life!! You definitely deserve it!! No doubt in my mind 🙂

    Conception by inexpensive means or by a pricey scientific route leads too the same gift at the end – you can’t fake that. Its not fair to you and Nick – or your little ladies – to think this is any less real. Love your life and the lives of your growing family!

    I admire your will not to forget where you came from! Recognizing your pregnancy as the blessing that it is – keeps you level headed and compassionate for those who are struggling. You remain a beam of hope for those who are currently struggling – and can offer support and encouragement from a place of knowing. That is priceless!

    With that said – enjoy every minute of your healthy, normal pregnancy. If you’re lucky, it will last 9 months – but your babies will likely rob you of several weeks .

    Reply
  17. 34

    Dutchie says

    March 25, 2011 at 3:09 pm

    You absolutely deserve it, you’ll be a great mom.

    Reply
  18. 35

    Dutchie says

    March 25, 2011 at 3:09 pm

    You absolutely deserve it, you’ll be a great mom.

    Reply

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We are Nick and Bethany! Welcome to our blog, Reality Daydream where we share our DIY adventures!
Click here for lots of art projects using only wood stain on furniture!!
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Attention: Almost any do-it-yourself project involves risk of some sort. Your tools, materials, and skills will vary, as will the conditions at your project site. Reality Daydream has made every effort to be complete and accurate in the instructions of the plans on this website. Reality Daydream will not assume any responsibility or liability for damages or losses sustained or incurred in the course of your project or in the use of the item you create. Always follow the manufacturer’s operating instructions in the use of tools, check and follow your local building codes, and observe all commonly accepted safety precautions.

 

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