Today I had a profound moment when I realized that, although I’ve been feeling sorry for myself and nothing seems to be going right, if I were to just step back from my pathetic self for a moment, I would realize how blessed and selfish I am. Just because I despise my work (with the exception of my love for my adorable elderly residents… who make it almost worth it) doesn’t mean that I should completely disregard the fact that I have a wonderful and sensitive husband, a new massive house in the country like I always dreamed but never thought I would obtain, and a great church body that has brought me closer to the Lord and provided me with new encouraging friends. What right do I have to be depressed? The fact that I spend the majority of my waking hours with coworkers that gossip and talk trash behind my back, and don’t provide quality care to my aging close friends, shouldn’t ruin everything else in my life that I have going for me. I’m going to pick up my sorry little ass, make myself something delicious and unhealthy to eat, and enjoy this wonderful life I’ve been given. There you have it. I invite you to hold me accountable.
I love your transparency, Bethany. There is great strength in being able to be so honest with people who need to know struggles are absolutely normal. Your entry was beautifully written. “Each time he said, ‘My grace is all you need. My power works best in weakness.’ So now I am glad to boast about my weaknesses, so that the power of Christ can work through me. That’s why I take pleasure in my weaknesses, and in the insults, hardships, persecutions, and troubles that I suffer for Christ. For when I am weak, then I am strong.” 2 Corinthians 12:9-10
p.s. I’m not trying to say you are weak, cuz you’re not! hahaha
Isn’t blog therapy wonderful?! It really helped me! I wish you the best on your quest to be a “glass half full” person! Focus on God and the good in your life… the rest, though still a nuisance, will seem more insignificant!